Something to think about…

Minsan, naisip ko na ring magwala sa isang lugar na walang nakakakita saken. kahet siguro magtumbling ako kahet hindi ako marunong walang makikielam.

—-patikim lang. edit ko na lang toh pag may totoong storya na ako na isusulat. haha.

okay. I am ready to talk. well, gamet ko ang laptop ng pinakamamahal kong pinsan *nakz! hahaha pinakamamahal na agad* and naisip ko na kung ano ang gagawin ko kapag nanalo ako sa lotto or if mapasa saken ang mga swerte ng ibang tao tungkol sa pera. hahahaha. so, share ko lang… i hate people na hindi man lang marunong magconstruct ng tamang sentence sa english, i mean i am not claiming na i know everything about the language, but people would know right away if it is a typo or not, right?! You could easily know if she is totally faking it or not. Try to review your english lessons back in elementary. look for the lesson about sentence construction. please do. I wouldn't really care if you won't, but believe me, i will never talk to you seriously if you'll be an idiot trying to be all gangster and stuff. I know it's boring to talk about sentence construction but hey, it's really a must. Maybe that is why our alma mater (Sta.Isabel College) wanted us to speak in english inside and outside the campus. for 10-Honesty *my class!* you have to pay P10 per sentence, P2 per word if you dont follow the rules. It is effective! though, some of my friends think that it's all crap because you get too syala or maarte if you speak in english outside. some of us just pass around notes written in tagalog for them not to pay the fucking penalty.*i must admit i'm one of `em stupids!* But, at least I am proud to say that Isabelans are good in english. better that Assumptionistas, if i may say *sorry girls. my school first!* they really wanted us to be succesful human beings.Even if some of us dont have a high paying job to brag about, and maybe some dont have a job at all. At least we know the universal language (too highschool harhar).So, there. you just have to work on it girl. please do. and i will be happy to talk to you again. i mean, really talk to you. kase ako ang nahihirapan pag english ka pa ng english eh. so. tagalog na lang di ba? don't make pilit if you really can't. just be yourself. be real. everyone loves REAL PEOPLE.

ta. ==peeyaya 

kc…. crush kita!

my ultimate crush!

    i love her smile… her uhmm.. voice?! lol. but i really love her. i even wanna see her! matalinong bata, and hindi showbiz for me. and …. friend ko sya sa multiply! thanks VAN! harharrr…. kahet date pa.. like ko na sya. sayang lang kase straight sya. but i will be sooooo proud if lesbian sya *sanaaa!!* hahahaha…

KC CONCEPCION IN PARIS!

sya ung nasa gilid harhar.!

work related shit

PRESSURED NA AKO. yan ang nararamdaman ko ngayon. nakakasuka na minsan ang ginagawa kong everyday sa work. pero enjoy pa rin. I dont know if they will let me stay here if ganon lague ang trabaho ko. VAN made a sale na. and super happy ako for him. kase first outbound work nya toh. good job! ATE VICKY said na ganon daw talaga. pero hello, i cant be like this sa work. i love working for branders and i dont want to lose my job again. kahet wala ng commission, i just have to sell. i just have to prove something. i have to make an impression. i have to save my name. Now, one freaking question na lang lague ang naiisip ko :

KELAN ANG MOMENT KO?!?

goodluck di ba. GOODLUCK.

loving.hurting.lesbian style

  I totally think na hindi dapat magpakaobvious ang isang fem kung mahal mo na ang butch na tinuturing kang isang friend. i mean, andyan na ung magiging demanding ka and youll never feel na nakakasakal na minsan ung pagiging "friend" mo sa kanya. Whether you like it or not, there is a possibility na mawala na ung so called friendship nyo. Hello?! I mean, if you are friend i dont think na you should even demand on personal stuff. it is her dicretion kung ano ang gagawin nya or magiging decision nya isang bagay. you have no right to tell her what to do and what to say, you are just a friend. at the end of the day, your opinion would not matter at all. hindi lang ikaw ang kinakausap nya, and meron pa ring ibang tao na mas close sa kanya. so let it go. I as an example would never ever befriend someone who is manipulating me in a way. yes, i have a lot of friends and there is nothing wrong with it. pero syempre they have limitations. they know what their limitations are. sometimes nga my friends dont really talk or react that much when it comes to personal stuff kase they know me. i would not take their advice or even listen to them if their advice is crappy. and i do not fall in love with my friends. that is THE RULE of friendship for me. unless mutual di ba. pero if not baket mo kailangan sabihin or mahalin ng todo ang isang tao? nagpapakatanga ka ba? or desperado ka lang? for sure alam mo ang mga tipo nyang girls. and you would know naman if you will pass her standards. so beat it. scram. just keep your feelings na lang., it will do you no good. and it would not matter naman eh, But if the person likes you as well, then good. pero do not.. hear me out DO NOT assume na she likes you as someone that can get her out of her miserable lovelife. who knows pero if that person treats you like a normal human being. then that is it. nothing will go beyond that. no malice dude. and dont ever think about putting malice all over your friendship. that is one of my pet peeves. i hate — loathe people na super assuming. some people even try to deny na ganon na sila sa "so called" friend nila. I mean, come on! if you tell other people about stuff na hindi naman dapat ishare and you think of weird things about your conversation dont you think it's obvious na may feelings ka for the dyke? why do have to hide it? ye. be proud but please don't brag too much. flaunting something that you don't have is soooo whatever. taking you back to my past. I was one those freaks na super magisip sa ibang tao. I don't know. there is nothing wrong with me, pero i just fell right off. and right off the bat din narerealize ko na it's useless. kahet na anong gawin ko, if we are just friends. WE ARE JUST FRIENDS. I dont have anything against you guys. it is ok to love, and pain is normal. it is something that you hold on to. laughter and pain completes your whole being. be doubtful of your spiritual weakness if you do not feel any pain. for you cannot truly love a person if you did not feel any pain before. no sense? think again. pain makes you stronger, wiser, bolder. and when pain subsides love will fill your heart and mind. and when that time comes there is no turning back for you. no u-turn slot sweetie.

i was fooled. faking would do you NO good miss ;]

I'll try to write something different. something that can make someone listen. it's taglish. don't worry.

It gets so funny when people think na someone really likes them. I mean come on man! but who know's di ba? Minsan i get fooled din naman and i admit na i fall for other people din na does not like me. for example.. i had a huge crush sa isang butch na i thought would really like me. I mean she was nice and all, but in the end… sobrang nainis ako kase she has a gf na pala. and she wants to be my buddy lang. I mean, hello? are you serious man? I would not say her name para hindi naman mapahiya ang tao. and i would not want anyone asking me kung anong nangyare after. ever!. kase i cried. hahah! I just thought about the funny things about lesbians, and ung love and so called love between two girls. And the thing is, i do it sa ibang tao rin. kaya siguro karma found a shorcut pabalik saken. hahah!

Other side of my world : Even if I care and get scared I dont really think that a person could get attracted to another person that quick. unless your like me. looking for someone that can make me smile again and make me realize that i am a human being that is worthy of someone's attention. or something like that. If I can choose someone to be my partner for life, it would definitely be a MAN. but hey. I am allergic to guys who courts me and wants to get laid. sooo, forget about what i said.
anyway. something happened.

have no sleep and i am at work. i dont want to be like this. working just because i have to. just to kill boredom, just to see other people. for money. for new clothes. and another piss off moment. She told me a couple of times that she is sorry and she never meant to hurt me. she knows that i am fucking mad. but the truth is, i am not. and that's the weird part. i am not mad at all. i am hurt. i just feel bad. why do people hurt others. then make lame excuses when they get caught. hey. ive done that a couple of times, but for the love of God, dont fake anything… dont fake love. dont hurt people that needs love. some people play games but i dont. so do not play with me. you are just wasting my time, love and trust.
Even if i laugh or cry it all out, it'll never change the fact that you faked something. you lied. and i loathe liars, but then again, Thank you for being that sweet girl who made me smile weeks. thank you for being honest and brave enough to answer my questions. I want to believe you and i want to workn things out. But then again, things like these pisses me hard. I will take your word and i will take a chance. I know that you care for me. you showed interest and we actually connected. you showed effort and thought of good things to say. I LIKE YOU miss. and that's it. nothing's gonna change that. NOTHING.